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Why Men Love Bitches

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An Interview With Sherry Argov

Chapter 1 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

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Introduction
Why Men Love BitchesContending that some women are "too nice," comedian and radio show host Sherry Argov has written Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl-A Woman's Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship. "I'm not recommending that a woman have an abrasive disposition," Argov writes, "The woman I'm describing is kind yet strong. She doesn't give up her life, and she won't chase a man." Her sassy book is filled with scenarios and advice aimed at making women subtly stronger and self-empowered. Argov's principles, which range from the farfetched to the downright absurd, include "If you give him a feeling of power, he'll want to protect you and he'll want to give you the world" and "A little distance combined with the appearance of self-control makes him nervous that he may be losing you." The book, which has already been featured on The View and The O'Reilly Factor, should make waves with its controversial view of relationships. Copyright 2002 Cahners Business Information. 
About Sherry Argov
SHERRY ARGOV is the New York Times bestselling author of Why Men Marry Bitches and Why Men Love Bitches and has been featured on The Today Show, The View, The O'Reilly Factor, and MSNBC. Published in more than twenty-five languages throughout the world, her books have received critical acclaim as a first-class theater play abroad, and her work has appeared in over thirty magazines including Cosmopolitan, Elle, Glamour, Marie Claire, Modern Bride, Fitness, Shape, Maxim, Esquire, as well as in People magazine.

An Interview With Sherry Argov
What inspired you to come up with the books Why Men Love Bitches and Why Men Marry Bitches
SHERRY ARGOV: Reading other books on the subject inspired me, but I felt that most books were not speaking the same language and the information was misleading women. After perusing the most popular fashion magazines, I saw that they gave bad advice and would misquote therapists. Any reader would pick up that horrible advice which conveys the message that the value of a woman depends on her breasts, flawless complexion, and a size 2-4 body with tips on "How to be Used as a Sex Toy in 101 Different Ways." After interviewing 2-3 men per night for an entire whole year, I wrote these books to educate women and expose secrets that men keep on relationships.
 You use the word bitch in both titles of your books. What is your definition of this infamous word?
SA The word bitch is a word to keep women in their place and is used with a negative connotation. I see it as a woman standing up for herself, but it’s so ironic that it is perceived in a different manner. Bitch (noun) A woman who won’t bang her head against the wall obsessing over someone else’s opinion—be it a man or anyone else in her life. She understands that if someone does not approve of her, it’s just one person’s opinion. Therefore, it’s of no real importance. She doesn’t try to live up to anyone else’s standards—only her own. Because of this, she relates to a man very differently.
What would you like women to learn about men?
SA I feel that men are wiser about relationships than women. Just like a peacock shows off his feathers to catch a peahen’s attention, a man will do stupid things to win the affection of the woman he cares for. When a man falls in love—you won’t be threatened with other women because you are the apple of his eye. No matter how busy he is, he will go out of his way and spend the money for every opportunity to be with you. He will value your opinion and will be protective of you and the relationship.
When it comes to dating, can you name a few things women should not do?
SA Picture that small boy on the playground who used to pull your pigtails to get your attention. Men love to play games, which is why women shouldn’t make it obvious what they want because they can use this to manipulate you. Make it clear you are there to have a good time in his company for the evening. Don’t sleep with the guy too soon. Don’t reveal too much sexually in terms of your past. Have a sense of humor and play fight with him, most men like a woman who can banter back with them. If you decide to go out with him again, don’t spend too much time sending him 20 text messages in one day or having two hour phone conversations—the hunter likes to sit and wait for the prey.
When it comes to a long term relationship, what can a woman do to keep her man?
SA Be confident and don’t let him be your source of strength. Get a job or a hobby and don’t stop working. If you are always waiting for him, he will take you for granted. There has to be something that keeps you interesting. It’s the fact that you are not waiting around that makes him appreciate you. Imagine the most exquisite buffet available to you 24/7. Eventually you will get tired of it and would like to go elsewhere.
What are the tell-tale signs that it’s time for Jack to hit the road?
SA When a man acts inconsiderate he is of no benefit to you. If he knows something will bother or hurt you and he does it anyway, it’s time to go. If there is infidelity or you even wonder if there is infidelity, it’s time to go. If you’ve lost your peace of mind or there is physical or verbal abuse, it’s time to go.
Any last words or thoughts you would like to share?
SA Why Men Marry Bitches is on the New York Times best seller’s list and plans are underway to make it into a first class theatre production on Broadway within the next two years.
Why Men Marry Bitches is available on bookstands. To learn more about the author, please visit www.sherryargov.com.
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Chapter 1 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

  1. Do you feel that this book is about teaching women how to control men with various mind games and manipulative tactics? Or is it teaching a man who’s interested about secret thoughts that many women have and what kind of mind games to look out for? 
  1. The “nice girl” syndrome is a very harsh reality that a lot of women suffer with. What do you think women can do to prevent this experience from further damaging themselves and their relationships?
     
  2. What are some “nice girl” mistakes that you’ve made in your relationships that the author doesn’t mention and do you really believe that men love bitches?

 

  1. According to the author, men like a mental challenge. Do you think that black men confuse a mental challenge with being verbally combative? Back to top

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